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Spring Season: Week 79
Last couple of days off. Sad as usual, but flying super high on how much I loved All Out last night, so I may treat myself to a rewatch once night falls. Trying to avoid having to put on pants all day, on account of it being a holiday and all, let's see if I can make it!
It's Halloween now, and while I'm not in the mood to set any hard-and-fast 'watch something scary every day' rules, I definitely want to spook up my viewing accordingly, so I will be attempting to watch sixty horror movies before October 31st alongside my usual assortment of bullshit. Looking forward to it! To the spoiler zone~
FILMS
Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970): This thing is truly operating on a level somewhere far above anything I'm able to grasp. I mean, "You will drink the black sperm of my vengeance" SERIOUSLY WHAT IS HAPPENING. Great music, though.
Candyman (1992): Sixty Spooks #2 of 60! Totally didn't clock that the new one was a sequel until super late in the game, but I had just enough time to get this in, because it had been WAY too long, and I'm very glad I did!
Candyman (2021): Sixty Spooks #3 of 60!: Very viscerally satisfying. I think I prefer the grimy gothic stylings of the original, but Barker adaptations just hit differently in the 80s/90s and this is less an update of those vibes than it is taking the deeper themes that held them up so masterfully and spinning them out into something shinier for our modern sensibilities. A black woman gentrifying a movie made by a white man? Is that a thing? Probably not, since it builds upon the original instead of demolishing it. I don't know what I'm saying anymore, but I dug this a lot.
Compañeros (1970): I feel like I've seen every single aspect of this movie, completely unchanged, in other movies. Not necessarily in this exact combination, though, so it's still a pretty good time. Let's face it, I'm mostly just here for the score.
Did You Wonder Who Fired the Gun? (2017): A dry, plodding entry in the 'did you know AMERICA... is racist????' canon. The story it has to tell is one worth knowing, but you gotta wade through a whole lot of white angst to get there.
Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001): deny me and be doomed
Hitch Hike (1977): The shit I'll watch for my maestro. Spent the entire thing just hoping Eve would get to kill her husband above and beyond the murderous rapist. Suffice it to say, I left disappointed. What a thoroughly miserable time.
Late Night Trains (1975): Sixty Spooks #5 of 60! The Night Train Murders? Damn Italian movies with 50 different titles. Whatever, I think I would have enjoyed this a lot more if fully half of it wasn't just 'the boring night train ride that would eventually lead to murders', woof. Like, I can appreciate a slow burn as much as the next person, but something needs to actually be on fire.
Phantasm II (1988): Sixty Spooks #1 of 60! lol what
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021): I definitely prefer a hell of a lot less CGI in my big martial arts action setpieces, but I knew what I was walking into. I also kinda didn't; this reached some heights of epic feeling mythology through that superhero lens that I was very much not ready for! What a great time at the movies. I would die for Morris.
SHORTS
Beach Week (2015): Sixty Spooks #4 of 60! I didn't quite get the point of all that, but I'm happy for them. Or sorry that happened. ALL HAIL ORB.
Jeanne d'Arc (1900): A somewhat straightforward little historical drama, bookended by a pair of absolutely stunning shots.
One A.M. (1916): Chaplin as every drunk girl getting home after leaving the club. Or maybe I'm just projecting. Absolutely masterful.
Ramona (2015): Loved this? Female revenge flick that skips the presumed hacky sexual violence and goes straight to the roaring revenge part with a killer eight-minute long shot. Letting you read whatever you want into her motives is so much more interesting than the same old, same old. Also that's how Hangman killed Joey Ryan.
The Suicide (1978): Perfectly serviceable student film. The actual self-harm sequences were pretty cringy in all the wrong ways, but I remember the stuff I was making at 17, so I ain't gonna judge.
The Travelling Companion (1977): Kinda sapped a bit of the childlike wonder and magic when a couple of the flying people just lit up some cigarettes. Love the colours and design of the world on display here, but ultimately it's just kinda something that exists. Also the princess being played by a kid, but not any of the guys talking about how beautiful she is was creepy as hell.
TELEVISION
Marvel Studios: Legends 1x13: I was a little surprised they put this much work into a recap for a movie that was gonna be all new characters, but the existing Ten Rings lore did end up being a lot more relevant to Shang-Chi than I expected! Also, I'm not sure if it's just because it's been long enough for the annoyance to fade or because they found a way to actually celebrate Asian characters with it instead, but the post-Iron Man 3 'oh actually there's a REAL Mandarin after all' swerve doesn't get under my skin nearly as much as it used to. At the time, it felt like just placating the worst people, who were mad that they got tricked and he was a white guy instead of a yellow peril caricature. Now we get something more interesting than either! Hooray!
Queer Eye 4x01-4x06: This week off's catchup viewing goes to feel-good schlock, because sometimes you just gotta.
Riverdale 5x14: Just when I was trying to remember how that whole Jughead/mothman/maple syrup aliens plot turned out, he goes and falls in a sinkhole and meets a rat king. God dammit, Jughead. Does a man biting his own tongue off to kill himself because she threatened to dismember him count as a death for Betty's body count? I feel like I really should start keeping track.
Star Trek: Lower Decks 2x04 If nobody's happy... THAT'S A COMPROMISE!!!
What If...? 1x04: This shit is getting so dark, and I love it. Give me more monster-eating anime villain Strange. Give me more kirby krackle in my big climactic magic battles. MORE, MORE, MORE.
Wrestling
Countdown to All Out
AEW All Out 2021
AEW Dark 3x37
AEW Dark: Elevation 1x26
AEW Dynamite 3x35
AEW Rampage 1x04
Before the IMPACT 1x29
IMPACT! Wrestling 18x35
New Japan Pro-Wrestling 1x39
NJPW Strong 2x35
NWA Powerrr 6x01
ROH Week By Week 2x35
ROH Women's Division Wednesday 1x19
ROH Wrestling 13x35
We are STARDOM!! 1x35-1x39
It's Halloween now, and while I'm not in the mood to set any hard-and-fast 'watch something scary every day' rules, I definitely want to spook up my viewing accordingly, so I will be attempting to watch sixty horror movies before October 31st alongside my usual assortment of bullshit. Looking forward to it! To the spoiler zone~
FILMS
Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970): This thing is truly operating on a level somewhere far above anything I'm able to grasp. I mean, "You will drink the black sperm of my vengeance" SERIOUSLY WHAT IS HAPPENING. Great music, though.
Candyman (1992): Sixty Spooks #2 of 60! Totally didn't clock that the new one was a sequel until super late in the game, but I had just enough time to get this in, because it had been WAY too long, and I'm very glad I did!
Candyman (2021): Sixty Spooks #3 of 60!: Very viscerally satisfying. I think I prefer the grimy gothic stylings of the original, but Barker adaptations just hit differently in the 80s/90s and this is less an update of those vibes than it is taking the deeper themes that held them up so masterfully and spinning them out into something shinier for our modern sensibilities. A black woman gentrifying a movie made by a white man? Is that a thing? Probably not, since it builds upon the original instead of demolishing it. I don't know what I'm saying anymore, but I dug this a lot.
Compañeros (1970): I feel like I've seen every single aspect of this movie, completely unchanged, in other movies. Not necessarily in this exact combination, though, so it's still a pretty good time. Let's face it, I'm mostly just here for the score.
Did You Wonder Who Fired the Gun? (2017): A dry, plodding entry in the 'did you know AMERICA... is racist????' canon. The story it has to tell is one worth knowing, but you gotta wade through a whole lot of white angst to get there.
Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001): deny me and be doomed
Hitch Hike (1977): The shit I'll watch for my maestro. Spent the entire thing just hoping Eve would get to kill her husband above and beyond the murderous rapist. Suffice it to say, I left disappointed. What a thoroughly miserable time.
Late Night Trains (1975): Sixty Spooks #5 of 60! The Night Train Murders? Damn Italian movies with 50 different titles. Whatever, I think I would have enjoyed this a lot more if fully half of it wasn't just 'the boring night train ride that would eventually lead to murders', woof. Like, I can appreciate a slow burn as much as the next person, but something needs to actually be on fire.
Phantasm II (1988): Sixty Spooks #1 of 60! lol what
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021): I definitely prefer a hell of a lot less CGI in my big martial arts action setpieces, but I knew what I was walking into. I also kinda didn't; this reached some heights of epic feeling mythology through that superhero lens that I was very much not ready for! What a great time at the movies. I would die for Morris.
SHORTS
Beach Week (2015): Sixty Spooks #4 of 60! I didn't quite get the point of all that, but I'm happy for them. Or sorry that happened. ALL HAIL ORB.
Jeanne d'Arc (1900): A somewhat straightforward little historical drama, bookended by a pair of absolutely stunning shots.
One A.M. (1916): Chaplin as every drunk girl getting home after leaving the club. Or maybe I'm just projecting. Absolutely masterful.
Ramona (2015): Loved this? Female revenge flick that skips the presumed hacky sexual violence and goes straight to the roaring revenge part with a killer eight-minute long shot. Letting you read whatever you want into her motives is so much more interesting than the same old, same old. Also that's how Hangman killed Joey Ryan.
The Suicide (1978): Perfectly serviceable student film. The actual self-harm sequences were pretty cringy in all the wrong ways, but I remember the stuff I was making at 17, so I ain't gonna judge.
The Travelling Companion (1977): Kinda sapped a bit of the childlike wonder and magic when a couple of the flying people just lit up some cigarettes. Love the colours and design of the world on display here, but ultimately it's just kinda something that exists. Also the princess being played by a kid, but not any of the guys talking about how beautiful she is was creepy as hell.
TELEVISION
Marvel Studios: Legends 1x13: I was a little surprised they put this much work into a recap for a movie that was gonna be all new characters, but the existing Ten Rings lore did end up being a lot more relevant to Shang-Chi than I expected! Also, I'm not sure if it's just because it's been long enough for the annoyance to fade or because they found a way to actually celebrate Asian characters with it instead, but the post-Iron Man 3 'oh actually there's a REAL Mandarin after all' swerve doesn't get under my skin nearly as much as it used to. At the time, it felt like just placating the worst people, who were mad that they got tricked and he was a white guy instead of a yellow peril caricature. Now we get something more interesting than either! Hooray!
Queer Eye 4x01-4x06: This week off's catchup viewing goes to feel-good schlock, because sometimes you just gotta.
Riverdale 5x14: Just when I was trying to remember how that whole Jughead/mothman/maple syrup aliens plot turned out, he goes and falls in a sinkhole and meets a rat king. God dammit, Jughead. Does a man biting his own tongue off to kill himself because she threatened to dismember him count as a death for Betty's body count? I feel like I really should start keeping track.
Star Trek: Lower Decks 2x04 If nobody's happy... THAT'S A COMPROMISE!!!
What If...? 1x04: This shit is getting so dark, and I love it. Give me more monster-eating anime villain Strange. Give me more kirby krackle in my big climactic magic battles. MORE, MORE, MORE.
Wrestling
Countdown to All Out
AEW All Out 2021
AEW Dark 3x37
AEW Dark: Elevation 1x26
AEW Dynamite 3x35
AEW Rampage 1x04
Before the IMPACT 1x29
IMPACT! Wrestling 18x35
New Japan Pro-Wrestling 1x39
NJPW Strong 2x35
NWA Powerrr 6x01
ROH Week By Week 2x35
ROH Women's Division Wednesday 1x19
ROH Wrestling 13x35
We are STARDOM!! 1x35-1x39
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"My Aunt Trudy," I replied.
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