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Spring Season: Week 77
I should be going to bed soon. But I don't want to! I will be tired in the morning regardless, my nails are still drying, fuck it, have another tiny li'l movie roundup post.
FILMS
Free Guy (2021): FINALLY, I CAN STOP SEEING TRAILERS FOR THIS THING. It was fun! Much more heartfelt than expected, even as it gets pretty bogged down in the usual 'movie talking about video games in ways that is total nonsense' stuff. If only they could make me care about the real-life romance subplot in the slightest, I was totally left wanting her to just date the AI guy who was programmed to love her somehow. The Serenity sequel we didn't deserve.
The Protégé (2021): Forgettable actioner of the type that was all over the place 20-30 years ago. Corny as hell in places, the script oozes mediocrity, but everyone involved in putting it to screen does their job so well that it actually provides a decent time? Keaton is miscast as hell but pulls his weight, Maggie Q deserves the world. And also to headline better movies.
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981): I would never want to see a movie for the first time at a drive-in, as I truly do not get the lasting appeal for the format beyond a bit of novelty. It's such a sub-optimal viewing experience in so many ways! This was fun, though, although I think I ruined Indy for my mom a bit by making her realize how young Marian was when they initially hooked up; she was under the impression they were the same age!
Reminiscence (2021): I can't figure out if this is a middling sci-fi wearing noir cosplay, or a straight noir homage with vague sci-fi underpinnings. It probably doesn't matter. The movie was not good, but the gimmick worked for me either way, and now I want people to just set a whole bunch of unrelated movies in this world for no good reason. It would cost far too much to ever be worth it, but I don't care.
SHORTS
I Remember: A Film About Joe Brainard (2012): "I remember usually saying that I swam a lot (a lie) and painted a lot (true) and did a lot of reading (not true) and that the summer went very fast (true). They always have and they still do, or so it seems to me when summer is over." Yeah. Yeah. :(
Les quatre cents farces du diable (1906): Something about the way this particular restoration constantly had to cut between different prints of varying quality, some with colour, some without, some fuzzy and indistinct, some shockingly crisp, it kinda added a whole extra layer of unintended magic to the thing.
The Pawnshop (1916): Sometimes the tramp is just a straight-up sociopath, huh?
La colonne de feu (1899): I have totally found my Halloween costume for this year.
The Rink (1916): A bit of a slog whenever nobody is wearing skates; solid gold whenever they are.
This Side of Paradise: Fragments of an Unfinished Biography (1999): Hmm, yep. Still fuckin' hate Mekas. Just checking. I think I also hate the Kennedys now, too.
TELEVISION
Riverdale 5x12: Holy shit, Reggie got an actual story! It only took five goddamn years and had to be buried inside of a fucking Hiram episode unrelated to anything else happening this season, but gosh darn it, I'll take it! Mark Consuelos' son is not a good actor! I do legit love that they brought back the trope of the kids all playing their parents (RETURN OF THE MIDNIGHT CLUB) and doubled down on it, with the parents now ALSO playing THEIR parents. I hope they keep going back through the generations for no reason every season or so.
Star Trek: Lower Decks 2x02 Favourite random bit of animation detail so far: the way everyone who carried tiny puppet Kayshon lovingly cradled him oh so protectively. I, too, would die for puppet Kayshon.
The Twilight Zone 1x01-1x07: I started watching this back when it was airing before falling off after about three episodes, but it's fun enough! So far, the episodes seem to run the gamut between solid, solid with a twist that just doesn't work, and BAD just really bad, but the star-studded casts and general care for atmosphere keep it from ever being uninteresting. And Jordan Peele is sufficiently zaddy, so.
What If...? 1x02: SO MUCH FUN. I like that they opened with the more straightforward 'it's The First Avenger, but different' episode to establish the premise before just going full wild butterfly effect AU shenanigans with the follow-up. Triple-crossing femme fatale Nebula! Thanos as the good-natured heavy of the gang! Once again, I would happily take a whole series set in this world, but I also like always being left wanting more. Chadwick though. :(
Wrestling
AEW Dark 3x35
AEW Dark: Elevation 1x23/1x24
AEW Dynamite 3x33
AEW Rampage 1x02
Before the IMPACT 1x27
IMPACT! Wrestling 18x33
IMPACT Emergence 2021
New Japan Pro-Wrestling 1x37
NJPW Strong 2x33
NWA Powerrr 5x10
ROH Week By Week 2x33
ROH Women's Division Wednesday 1x17
ROH Wrestling 13x33
We are STARDOM!! 1x28-1x32
FILMS
Free Guy (2021): FINALLY, I CAN STOP SEEING TRAILERS FOR THIS THING. It was fun! Much more heartfelt than expected, even as it gets pretty bogged down in the usual 'movie talking about video games in ways that is total nonsense' stuff. If only they could make me care about the real-life romance subplot in the slightest, I was totally left wanting her to just date the AI guy who was programmed to love her somehow. The Serenity sequel we didn't deserve.
The Protégé (2021): Forgettable actioner of the type that was all over the place 20-30 years ago. Corny as hell in places, the script oozes mediocrity, but everyone involved in putting it to screen does their job so well that it actually provides a decent time? Keaton is miscast as hell but pulls his weight, Maggie Q deserves the world. And also to headline better movies.
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981): I would never want to see a movie for the first time at a drive-in, as I truly do not get the lasting appeal for the format beyond a bit of novelty. It's such a sub-optimal viewing experience in so many ways! This was fun, though, although I think I ruined Indy for my mom a bit by making her realize how young Marian was when they initially hooked up; she was under the impression they were the same age!
Reminiscence (2021): I can't figure out if this is a middling sci-fi wearing noir cosplay, or a straight noir homage with vague sci-fi underpinnings. It probably doesn't matter. The movie was not good, but the gimmick worked for me either way, and now I want people to just set a whole bunch of unrelated movies in this world for no good reason. It would cost far too much to ever be worth it, but I don't care.
SHORTS
I Remember: A Film About Joe Brainard (2012): "I remember usually saying that I swam a lot (a lie) and painted a lot (true) and did a lot of reading (not true) and that the summer went very fast (true). They always have and they still do, or so it seems to me when summer is over." Yeah. Yeah. :(
Les quatre cents farces du diable (1906): Something about the way this particular restoration constantly had to cut between different prints of varying quality, some with colour, some without, some fuzzy and indistinct, some shockingly crisp, it kinda added a whole extra layer of unintended magic to the thing.
The Pawnshop (1916): Sometimes the tramp is just a straight-up sociopath, huh?
La colonne de feu (1899): I have totally found my Halloween costume for this year.
The Rink (1916): A bit of a slog whenever nobody is wearing skates; solid gold whenever they are.
This Side of Paradise: Fragments of an Unfinished Biography (1999): Hmm, yep. Still fuckin' hate Mekas. Just checking. I think I also hate the Kennedys now, too.
TELEVISION
Riverdale 5x12: Holy shit, Reggie got an actual story! It only took five goddamn years and had to be buried inside of a fucking Hiram episode unrelated to anything else happening this season, but gosh darn it, I'll take it! Mark Consuelos' son is not a good actor! I do legit love that they brought back the trope of the kids all playing their parents (RETURN OF THE MIDNIGHT CLUB) and doubled down on it, with the parents now ALSO playing THEIR parents. I hope they keep going back through the generations for no reason every season or so.
Star Trek: Lower Decks 2x02 Favourite random bit of animation detail so far: the way everyone who carried tiny puppet Kayshon lovingly cradled him oh so protectively. I, too, would die for puppet Kayshon.
The Twilight Zone 1x01-1x07: I started watching this back when it was airing before falling off after about three episodes, but it's fun enough! So far, the episodes seem to run the gamut between solid, solid with a twist that just doesn't work, and BAD just really bad, but the star-studded casts and general care for atmosphere keep it from ever being uninteresting. And Jordan Peele is sufficiently zaddy, so.
What If...? 1x02: SO MUCH FUN. I like that they opened with the more straightforward 'it's The First Avenger, but different' episode to establish the premise before just going full wild butterfly effect AU shenanigans with the follow-up. Triple-crossing femme fatale Nebula! Thanos as the good-natured heavy of the gang! Once again, I would happily take a whole series set in this world, but I also like always being left wanting more. Chadwick though. :(
Wrestling
AEW Dark 3x35
AEW Dark: Elevation 1x23/1x24
AEW Dynamite 3x33
AEW Rampage 1x02
Before the IMPACT 1x27
IMPACT! Wrestling 18x33
IMPACT Emergence 2021
New Japan Pro-Wrestling 1x37
NJPW Strong 2x33
NWA Powerrr 5x10
ROH Week By Week 2x33
ROH Women's Division Wednesday 1x17
ROH Wrestling 13x33
We are STARDOM!! 1x28-1x32