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Spring Season: Week 76
New day, new week, I feel like I'm dying (hello period!), but I'm in the home stretch now, just gotta push through these last 24 hours of work and then make all sorts of grand plans for my week off that I will utterly fail to keep! Woo!
A shorter than usual spoiler zone, I'm trying to ease up on the movie marathons that make my free time just melt away, at least a little bit.
FILMS
Bandini (1963): Contains one of the most satisfying murder scenes I've seen in a while, and the characters all treat it exactly the same way, it's kinda hilarious? You go into the extensive flashbacks knowing that they're gonna end with Kalyani poisoning somebody, so when the horrible bitch wife shows up, the writing is on the wall and the worse she gets, the more you just get all twisted up into 'YASSS KILL HER' knots because it's already a foregone conclusion that she's gonna compromise her boring perfect pure morality and throw her life away over this so it might as well be worth it. OR MAYBE THAT WAS JUST ME? The scene where she finally fucking snaps with the random arc welder in the background for dramatic lighting was so good. And then afterward, after all the hemming and hawing about her secret horrific backstory, everyone is just kinda like SHRUG yeah I guess you're a murderer but you're still real nice and that guy's/my wife WAS pretty awful yolo!!
Darling (1965): God, early Schlesinger is always just so centered around such awful, insufferable people, I have so much trouble caring.
Don't Breathe 2 (2021): One of the most egregious gulfs between 'character the filmmakers think they made' and 'character they actually made' that I think I've ever seen. I don't think they tried to redeem him really (although the 'oh he won't kill the dog uwu guess he can't be THAT bad' shit was particularly gross), especially once the truth of where he got the kid he's been emotionally abusing comes out, but the movie presupposes a degree of sympathy for him that I'm sorry, is just not there. We got his tragic backstory in the first movie! It was great and made sense and humanized him! His subsequent actions still made him a terrifying monster! Having him acknowledge that he's a rapist in a big heartfelt moment does nothing to change that after how stomach-churning and memorable the initial reveal was; maybe if the first movie was as shoddily done as this one, it would have worked better. Like, this thing LOOKS great but is DUMB dumb in places; how does stabbing a guy through the cheek make more sense than trying to stab through the glue covering his mouth?? Why would they keep endangering the kid if they need her alive?? The attempt at a third-act reveal to show that these people are actually even worse than the blind guy was ridiculous compared to how the first movie's similar twist was delivered, but fun in its own way? Arguable as to whether it accomplishes its purpose though, we're dealing in shades of black, here. Also this movie makes Detroit look like such a post-apocalyptic shithole that it's kinda hilarious. The kid was pretty cool, though; she has a refreshing amount of agency considering how often she needs to be rescued. In conclusion: why the fuck does this exist.
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021): Well, it's the closest I'll ever come to getting to see The Devils in a theater, so it's got that going for it.
SHORTS
Le locataire diabolique (1909): Why can't packing/unpacking actually be this easy???
The Fireman (1916): Packs a surprising amount of plot in between the gags? Possibly at the expense of them somewhat? Still fun!
The Floorwalker (1916): I had to google what the word 'spondoolicks' meant!
The Immigrant (1917): If I ever get the urge to watch The Emigrants/The New Land again, somebody tell me to just watch this 16 times in a row instead.
Le voyage à travers l'impossible (1904): If Méliès was around today I'm pretty sure we'd be living movies in holodecks by now.
Le chaudron infernal (1903): 120 seconds of pure fun. Look at him go! Dancing around! Into the pot with you! Your turn! Last one! Oh they're ghosts now! Oh no they exploded! Haha what a little devil!
Le dirigeable fantastique (1905): nooooo don't float out of my dream airship ur so sexy aha
Le royaume des fées (1903): The underwater scenes are the clear standout, but the whole thing's just so purely joyous. I would kill for a ride in that whale. He's so cute and smiley!
TELEVISION
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 6x06/6x07: Ugh, okay, I made it through the fucking Fitzsimmons episode that halted all my momentum when the show was actually airing. Maybe I would have appreciated something like it more a couple of years ago, before they made me fucking despise both of those horrible assholes! Though it still wouldn't have changed the fact that Nazi Fitz and stupid monster Simmons had more romantic chemistry than the real things EVER managed. ANYWAY, ONWARDS. At some point, anyway, gonna probably put Operation Marvel Catchup on hold while What If is airing, and the next episode is a two-parter so it's probably a good place to take a break.
Riverdale 5x11: I SWORE ONCE SKEET WAS OUT SO WAS I, then they went and actually made it kinda fun again with the time jump, letting these kids be the actual ridiculous young adults they so clearly have always been. Those fuckers.
Star Trek: Lower Decks 2x01 Very silly! Very fun! This show grew on me a lot over the course of the first season after I was initially unimpressed, it really scratches that Trek itch that will not be fully soothed until Disco comes back. Helps a lot that it's clearly made by a bunch of nerds who just fucking love Star Trek.
What If...? 1x01: Okay, so I'm just gonna end up wanting a full series out of every episode of this damn thing, huh? FAIR ENOUGH. This was so much fun! Am about 50/50 on the animation, the faces are kinda shonky but the action looks great, a unified style still feels like a waste in a series about different universes but I get wanting a look that's as close to live action as they can get without it being live action so it fits in as an MCU thing (and I suspect they'll all end up being in the same universe this season anyway, so), etc. It gets the job done! Also, while I admire their commitment to getting as many of the actual actors as they can in, making it a real star-studded affair, some of them are not voice actors and it... well, doesn't show, but you know what I mean. Sebastian Stan, man, woof. Still, I dug it a lot! Feels a lot like an old issue of What If? in terms of breakneck pacing to get us through all the necessary beats in the span of 22 pages/30 minutes, just a whole world condensed to the important moments. Exciting, if not super narratively cohesive! ALL HAIL BIG PEG!!!
All three of these shows are on different streaming services, but at least I have them all for once. It's so much more convenient than having to pirate shit, and I wish it were more feasible to have access to everything I want to watch! My kingdom for a FITE AEW+ package like other countries have, man.
Wrestling
AAA Triplemanía XXIX
AEW Dark 3x34
AEW Dark: Elevation 1x22
AEW Dynamite 3x32
AEW Rampage 1x01
Before the IMPACT 1x26
IMPACT! Wrestling 18x32
New Japan Pro-Wrestling 1x36
NJPW Resurgence
NJPW Strong 2x32
NWA Powerrr 5x09
ROH Week By Week 2x32
ROH Women's Division Wednesday 1x16
ROH Wrestling 13x32
We are STARDOM!! 1x26/1x27
A shorter than usual spoiler zone, I'm trying to ease up on the movie marathons that make my free time just melt away, at least a little bit.
FILMS
Bandini (1963): Contains one of the most satisfying murder scenes I've seen in a while, and the characters all treat it exactly the same way, it's kinda hilarious? You go into the extensive flashbacks knowing that they're gonna end with Kalyani poisoning somebody, so when the horrible bitch wife shows up, the writing is on the wall and the worse she gets, the more you just get all twisted up into 'YASSS KILL HER' knots because it's already a foregone conclusion that she's gonna compromise her boring perfect pure morality and throw her life away over this so it might as well be worth it. OR MAYBE THAT WAS JUST ME? The scene where she finally fucking snaps with the random arc welder in the background for dramatic lighting was so good. And then afterward, after all the hemming and hawing about her secret horrific backstory, everyone is just kinda like SHRUG yeah I guess you're a murderer but you're still real nice and that guy's/my wife WAS pretty awful yolo!!
Darling (1965): God, early Schlesinger is always just so centered around such awful, insufferable people, I have so much trouble caring.
Don't Breathe 2 (2021): One of the most egregious gulfs between 'character the filmmakers think they made' and 'character they actually made' that I think I've ever seen. I don't think they tried to redeem him really (although the 'oh he won't kill the dog uwu guess he can't be THAT bad' shit was particularly gross), especially once the truth of where he got the kid he's been emotionally abusing comes out, but the movie presupposes a degree of sympathy for him that I'm sorry, is just not there. We got his tragic backstory in the first movie! It was great and made sense and humanized him! His subsequent actions still made him a terrifying monster! Having him acknowledge that he's a rapist in a big heartfelt moment does nothing to change that after how stomach-churning and memorable the initial reveal was; maybe if the first movie was as shoddily done as this one, it would have worked better. Like, this thing LOOKS great but is DUMB dumb in places; how does stabbing a guy through the cheek make more sense than trying to stab through the glue covering his mouth?? Why would they keep endangering the kid if they need her alive?? The attempt at a third-act reveal to show that these people are actually even worse than the blind guy was ridiculous compared to how the first movie's similar twist was delivered, but fun in its own way? Arguable as to whether it accomplishes its purpose though, we're dealing in shades of black, here. Also this movie makes Detroit look like such a post-apocalyptic shithole that it's kinda hilarious. The kid was pretty cool, though; she has a refreshing amount of agency considering how often she needs to be rescued. In conclusion: why the fuck does this exist.
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021): Well, it's the closest I'll ever come to getting to see The Devils in a theater, so it's got that going for it.
SHORTS
Le locataire diabolique (1909): Why can't packing/unpacking actually be this easy???
The Fireman (1916): Packs a surprising amount of plot in between the gags? Possibly at the expense of them somewhat? Still fun!
The Floorwalker (1916): I had to google what the word 'spondoolicks' meant!
The Immigrant (1917): If I ever get the urge to watch The Emigrants/The New Land again, somebody tell me to just watch this 16 times in a row instead.
Le voyage à travers l'impossible (1904): If Méliès was around today I'm pretty sure we'd be living movies in holodecks by now.
Le chaudron infernal (1903): 120 seconds of pure fun. Look at him go! Dancing around! Into the pot with you! Your turn! Last one! Oh they're ghosts now! Oh no they exploded! Haha what a little devil!
Le dirigeable fantastique (1905): nooooo don't float out of my dream airship ur so sexy aha
Le royaume des fées (1903): The underwater scenes are the clear standout, but the whole thing's just so purely joyous. I would kill for a ride in that whale. He's so cute and smiley!
TELEVISION
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 6x06/6x07: Ugh, okay, I made it through the fucking Fitzsimmons episode that halted all my momentum when the show was actually airing. Maybe I would have appreciated something like it more a couple of years ago, before they made me fucking despise both of those horrible assholes! Though it still wouldn't have changed the fact that Nazi Fitz and stupid monster Simmons had more romantic chemistry than the real things EVER managed. ANYWAY, ONWARDS. At some point, anyway, gonna probably put Operation Marvel Catchup on hold while What If is airing, and the next episode is a two-parter so it's probably a good place to take a break.
Riverdale 5x11: I SWORE ONCE SKEET WAS OUT SO WAS I, then they went and actually made it kinda fun again with the time jump, letting these kids be the actual ridiculous young adults they so clearly have always been. Those fuckers.
Star Trek: Lower Decks 2x01 Very silly! Very fun! This show grew on me a lot over the course of the first season after I was initially unimpressed, it really scratches that Trek itch that will not be fully soothed until Disco comes back. Helps a lot that it's clearly made by a bunch of nerds who just fucking love Star Trek.
What If...? 1x01: Okay, so I'm just gonna end up wanting a full series out of every episode of this damn thing, huh? FAIR ENOUGH. This was so much fun! Am about 50/50 on the animation, the faces are kinda shonky but the action looks great, a unified style still feels like a waste in a series about different universes but I get wanting a look that's as close to live action as they can get without it being live action so it fits in as an MCU thing (and I suspect they'll all end up being in the same universe this season anyway, so), etc. It gets the job done! Also, while I admire their commitment to getting as many of the actual actors as they can in, making it a real star-studded affair, some of them are not voice actors and it... well, doesn't show, but you know what I mean. Sebastian Stan, man, woof. Still, I dug it a lot! Feels a lot like an old issue of What If? in terms of breakneck pacing to get us through all the necessary beats in the span of 22 pages/30 minutes, just a whole world condensed to the important moments. Exciting, if not super narratively cohesive! ALL HAIL BIG PEG!!!
All three of these shows are on different streaming services, but at least I have them all for once. It's so much more convenient than having to pirate shit, and I wish it were more feasible to have access to everything I want to watch! My kingdom for a FITE AEW+ package like other countries have, man.
Wrestling
AAA Triplemanía XXIX
AEW Dark 3x34
AEW Dark: Elevation 1x22
AEW Dynamite 3x32
AEW Rampage 1x01
Before the IMPACT 1x26
IMPACT! Wrestling 18x32
New Japan Pro-Wrestling 1x36
NJPW Resurgence
NJPW Strong 2x32
NWA Powerrr 5x09
ROH Week By Week 2x32
ROH Women's Division Wednesday 1x16
ROH Wrestling 13x32
We are STARDOM!! 1x26/1x27