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Summer 2022 - Week 3
Morning updoot as I continue to mull over Fyter Fest developments and digest the FAR TOO MUCH pasta I partook in last night. This is gonna be a long one.
FILMS
Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022): I AM LEFT WITH FAR TOO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT MINION REPRODUCTION. Are they all hermaphroditic, or just Stuart? Or do they reproduce asexually, and the only way a chicken form could successfully mimic their reproductive systems was to give him both male and female sexual organs? OR do they reproduce sexually and Stuart was just pregnant when the movie started? The fact that his child remained in chicken form after the others were changed back would seem to go against that theory, though. ALSO: why am I always really high whenever I run into a coworker at the movies?
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022): Excellent spacy/godland worldbuilding, cool fights, actual character arcs, fun needle drops, good villain with compelling motivations ("damn, these guys are assholes" YES GO OFF), a whole stunning black and white planet, what a great time this was! Did a thing I really like by actually letting us see Thor and Jane's actual relationship, since it dates back to when these movies NEEDED a dashed-off romance that didn't need to exist beyond the first dramatic kisses (Multiverse of Madness did a little bit of this, but the first Strange movie was already on the cusp of the shift away from those shoehorned-in love interests, so Christine was already something of a fringe case to begin with), and now we can actually have an idea what it all entailed, and that's great. Extremely satisfying post-credit sequence given how many times I saw the trailer and muttered 'oh you just KNOW they've got someone good cast as Herc' to myself. Critics have decided these movies are bad now I guess, but I think the worst thing I could say about it is that it's very much Ragnarok 2: More of That, and a huge part of what made Ragnarok so seismic was how different and fresh it felt from everything that came before, and that sheer novelty is very much lacking here. Still a great spray-painted van of a movie.
SHORTS
A Reggae Session (1988): Why the fuck isn't this, like, five hours long??? SO GOOD, even with Chrissie Hynde bringing the awkward. I want to watch it on a tiny box of a television in the middle of the afternoon.
Washingtonia (2014): Yeah, I'm sure this is meant to impart all kinds of deep meanings, but I still don't know what they're meant to be!
We the Ragamuffin (1992): Great songs, impeccably terrible '90s style, just a nice quick shot of reggae and denim vibes.
We're Going to the Zoo (2006): Ships in the night, on the way to a zoo.
TELEVISION
Better Call Saul 6x08: Hahaha I'm in pain! Currently replaying the cold opens to this episode as well as the one from Rock and Hard Place over and over on a loop in my head! Nacho's violent death on his own terms giving way to something beautiful in the desert, while Howard's end amounts to nothing but ugly lies upon lies, and now he gets to share an unmarked grave with his murderer. It's fine! I'm fine! Everything is fine! Five fine episodes to go! Oh, also: Kim railing at Mike for not being there, Kim looking so small in her hoodie in front of Gus' house, Kim's face as she lifted the gun, KIM KIM KIM. FINE!!!!!
Disenchantment 2x01-2x10: So 'main character dies and goes to heaven' is just the card they play every mid-season finale, huh? Love Queenie Beanie.
GLOW 3x05: Watching this right after Elvis came out makes it feel like the universe wants me to see Vegas residencies only as insidious lifelong traps that make you rich BUT AT WHAT COST???
Grace and Frankie 6x03: Oh fuck, Michael McKean, NOT NOW OH GOD might have to put this back on hold.
The Life of Lee Moriarty: #TAIGASTYLE
Ms. Marvel 1x05: ......................eh. The big bad just kinda... changes her mind and that's the end of the big world-ending conflict? Except I guess Damage Control are the REAL baddies? Except I don't give a shit about them? Or any of this?
Orange is the New Black 7x03/7x04: This show is just kinda exhausting, huh? Was it always this, uh... let's go with unsubtle in its delivery of its very special lessons about America? Maybe I just don't like that one actress who is also in Damage Control.
Queer Eye: We're in Japan! 1x03/1x04: Oh my god I ran out of precious feel-good schlock, NOW WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
Queer Eye: Where There's a Will...: Just suffer I guess! Anyway, this one was probably a good one to end on, because it honestly kinda pissed me off a little. All of this dude's issues come from his crippling student loan debts! Just paying those off would help him SO much more than moisturizing his lips and giving him a goddamn sweet potato pie recipe!!
Riverdale 6x18/6x19: What is even left to say here? Other than that Sabrina kissing Nick in Jughead's body remains deeply upsetting. Hey, remember when Jason Blossom was dead? Those were the days.
Star Trek: Strange New Worlds 1x10: Christopher Pike really out there putting his whole pussy into redeeming the worst Starfleet uniform, what a goddamn hero. The Captain we deserve. Truly cannot wait for this show to come back to me, easily the best new Trek in decades (and I quite dig Disco a whole lot).
Westworld 4x03: MMMM, THAT'S GOOD ROBOT PARK ACTION. Of fucking COURSE the rebooted park would have a meta 'robot uprising' plot built right into it! Because of course it would!!! Plus the usual timeline fuckery between robot heaven and wherever Bernard and Stubbs are, and then we've got the mind-control horror flies just to make sure things don't get TOO fun and just hell yeah! Westworld!
Wrestling
AEW Dark 4x30
AEW Dark: Elevation 2x28
AEW Dynamite 4x27
AEW Rampage 2x27
AJW - April 29, 1991
AJW - May 26, 1991
AJW - August 18, 1991
Before the IMPACT 2x27
IMPACT! Wrestling 19x27
MLW Fusion 5x21
NJPW on AXS 6x19
NJPW on Roku 1x83
NJPW Strong 3x26
NJPW XTRA 1x27
NWA Powerrr 9x04
NWA USA 3x04
We are STARDOM!! 3x27
FILMS
Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022): I AM LEFT WITH FAR TOO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT MINION REPRODUCTION. Are they all hermaphroditic, or just Stuart? Or do they reproduce asexually, and the only way a chicken form could successfully mimic their reproductive systems was to give him both male and female sexual organs? OR do they reproduce sexually and Stuart was just pregnant when the movie started? The fact that his child remained in chicken form after the others were changed back would seem to go against that theory, though. ALSO: why am I always really high whenever I run into a coworker at the movies?
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022): Excellent spacy/godland worldbuilding, cool fights, actual character arcs, fun needle drops, good villain with compelling motivations ("damn, these guys are assholes" YES GO OFF), a whole stunning black and white planet, what a great time this was! Did a thing I really like by actually letting us see Thor and Jane's actual relationship, since it dates back to when these movies NEEDED a dashed-off romance that didn't need to exist beyond the first dramatic kisses (Multiverse of Madness did a little bit of this, but the first Strange movie was already on the cusp of the shift away from those shoehorned-in love interests, so Christine was already something of a fringe case to begin with), and now we can actually have an idea what it all entailed, and that's great. Extremely satisfying post-credit sequence given how many times I saw the trailer and muttered 'oh you just KNOW they've got someone good cast as Herc' to myself. Critics have decided these movies are bad now I guess, but I think the worst thing I could say about it is that it's very much Ragnarok 2: More of That, and a huge part of what made Ragnarok so seismic was how different and fresh it felt from everything that came before, and that sheer novelty is very much lacking here. Still a great spray-painted van of a movie.
SHORTS
A Reggae Session (1988): Why the fuck isn't this, like, five hours long??? SO GOOD, even with Chrissie Hynde bringing the awkward. I want to watch it on a tiny box of a television in the middle of the afternoon.
Washingtonia (2014): Yeah, I'm sure this is meant to impart all kinds of deep meanings, but I still don't know what they're meant to be!
We the Ragamuffin (1992): Great songs, impeccably terrible '90s style, just a nice quick shot of reggae and denim vibes.
We're Going to the Zoo (2006): Ships in the night, on the way to a zoo.
TELEVISION
Better Call Saul 6x08: Hahaha I'm in pain! Currently replaying the cold opens to this episode as well as the one from Rock and Hard Place over and over on a loop in my head! Nacho's violent death on his own terms giving way to something beautiful in the desert, while Howard's end amounts to nothing but ugly lies upon lies, and now he gets to share an unmarked grave with his murderer. It's fine! I'm fine! Everything is fine! Five fine episodes to go! Oh, also: Kim railing at Mike for not being there, Kim looking so small in her hoodie in front of Gus' house, Kim's face as she lifted the gun, KIM KIM KIM. FINE!!!!!
Disenchantment 2x01-2x10: So 'main character dies and goes to heaven' is just the card they play every mid-season finale, huh? Love Queenie Beanie.
GLOW 3x05: Watching this right after Elvis came out makes it feel like the universe wants me to see Vegas residencies only as insidious lifelong traps that make you rich BUT AT WHAT COST???
Grace and Frankie 6x03: Oh fuck, Michael McKean, NOT NOW OH GOD might have to put this back on hold.
The Life of Lee Moriarty: #TAIGASTYLE
Ms. Marvel 1x05: ......................eh. The big bad just kinda... changes her mind and that's the end of the big world-ending conflict? Except I guess Damage Control are the REAL baddies? Except I don't give a shit about them? Or any of this?
Orange is the New Black 7x03/7x04: This show is just kinda exhausting, huh? Was it always this, uh... let's go with unsubtle in its delivery of its very special lessons about America? Maybe I just don't like that one actress who is also in Damage Control.
Queer Eye: We're in Japan! 1x03/1x04: Oh my god I ran out of precious feel-good schlock, NOW WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
Queer Eye: Where There's a Will...: Just suffer I guess! Anyway, this one was probably a good one to end on, because it honestly kinda pissed me off a little. All of this dude's issues come from his crippling student loan debts! Just paying those off would help him SO much more than moisturizing his lips and giving him a goddamn sweet potato pie recipe!!
Riverdale 6x18/6x19: What is even left to say here? Other than that Sabrina kissing Nick in Jughead's body remains deeply upsetting. Hey, remember when Jason Blossom was dead? Those were the days.
Star Trek: Strange New Worlds 1x10: Christopher Pike really out there putting his whole pussy into redeeming the worst Starfleet uniform, what a goddamn hero. The Captain we deserve. Truly cannot wait for this show to come back to me, easily the best new Trek in decades (and I quite dig Disco a whole lot).
Westworld 4x03: MMMM, THAT'S GOOD ROBOT PARK ACTION. Of fucking COURSE the rebooted park would have a meta 'robot uprising' plot built right into it! Because of course it would!!! Plus the usual timeline fuckery between robot heaven and wherever Bernard and Stubbs are, and then we've got the mind-control horror flies just to make sure things don't get TOO fun and just hell yeah! Westworld!
Wrestling
AEW Dark 4x30
AEW Dark: Elevation 2x28
AEW Dynamite 4x27
AEW Rampage 2x27
AJW - April 29, 1991
AJW - May 26, 1991
AJW - August 18, 1991
Before the IMPACT 2x27
IMPACT! Wrestling 19x27
MLW Fusion 5x21
NJPW on AXS 6x19
NJPW on Roku 1x83
NJPW Strong 3x26
NJPW XTRA 1x27
NWA Powerrr 9x04
NWA USA 3x04
We are STARDOM!! 3x27